You are receiving this letter because you either wrote to us or you are a commercial real estate broker client of either Blackburne & Sons or C-Loans, Inc. Today we have a great, free download for you - "How To Find Houses to Flip." We also have lots of cute, clean jokes, some funny pics, and a hilarious video of a modern day job interview.

Joke Du Jour

A lady moved from Phoenix to Seattle, and the day she moved it was raining. While she moved in, it rained. The next day it rained... and the next. After several rainy days, while standing on her porch, she noticed a young boy on the porch of her neighbor's house. Trying not to sound too depressed, in a cheerful voice she called over to the lad, "Hi son, I'm your new neighbor." "Hi," the boy called back and waved. "Say, son, does it ever stop raining here?" she asked. With a look of consternation, the youngster replied, "How would I know, lady? I'm only six-years-old!"

Those of Us Who Own Cats Can Really Relate

Download Your Free Guide, "How To Find Houses To Flip"

Download your free guide here.

Save the Economy Joke

An old friend sent me this:

To help save the economy, the Government will announce next month that the Immigration Department will start deporting seniors (instead of illegals) in order to lower Social Security and Medicare costs. Older people are easier to catch, and they don't remember how to get back home. I started to cry when I thought of you. Then it dawned on me. Oh, crap! I'll see you on the bus.

Hot-To-Trot To Make Fix and Flip Loans

Blackburne & Sons is making a huge push into fix and flip lending. Of course we will still make our private money permanent loans on commercial properties nationwide; but we are now also looking to make fix and flip loans in most states across the country.

Please click here to submit a fix and flip loan or a private money commercial loan or call me, Tom Blackburne, at (574) 210-6686.

Oprah Joke

"The stars gathered in Los Angeles for the Golden Globes. Oprah Winfrey delivered a speech so powerful that all day long people have been asking if Oprah will run for president - which at this point, wouldn't president be a demotion for Oprah?" -- Jimmy Kimmel

Private Money Commercial Permanent Loans Nationwide From $100,000 to $3.5MM

Do you need a purchase money lender who will actually go to 75% loan-to-value? Banks never actually close deals at 75% LTV. Blackburne & Sons has decided to compete against banks by being far more aggressive on loan-to-value ratio. We are very bullish on commercial real estate.

Do you need a lender who will allow the seller to carry back a second mortgage? Does your client have a balloon payment coming due on his commercial property? Has your bank offered him a discounted pay-off? Does your borrower have less-than-stellar credit? Is your client's company losing money? Is your borrower a foreign national?

Do you need a non-recourse loan? Do you need a commercial loan with no prepayment penalty? Is your client's commercial property partially vacant? Do all of your commercial leases run out in the next 18 months? Do you need a lender who will allow a negative cash flow? Do you need a lender who will also look at the borrower's global income - income from salaries, other investments, etc.? Do you need a loan against a portfolio of single family homes?

Here is our latest rate sheet.

Blackburne & Sons is looking for commercial real estate loans that are not quite clean enough for a bank. Please click here to submit a private money commercial loan or call me, Tom Blackburne, at (574) 210-6686.

Pronunciation Joke

A young schoolboy was having a hard time pronouncing the letter "R" and all the other kids were, of course, teasing him about it. To help him out, the teacher gave him a sentence to practice at home: "Robert gave Richard a rap in the ribs for roasting the rabbit so rare." In class a few days later, the teacher asked the boy to recite the sentence out loud. The boy nervously eyed his classmates - many of them already laughing at him - then replied, "Bob gave Dick a poke in the side because the bunny wasn't cooked enough."

Put Down the Toilet Paper Roll and Step Away From the Bathroom

Fix and Flip Financing

You can get amazing leverage on fix and flip financing these days.

Fix and flip lenders, including Blackburne & Sons, will loan you 75% to 85% of the cost of the dilapidated house, plus 100% of the cost of the renovation, plus a four-month interest reserve.

Quite frankly, it's a helluva deal. Few other industries offer this kind of leverage. If you are not already flipping houses, it is something that you should consider.

I just wrote a wonderful article that explains everything you need to know about fix and flip financing.

My blog also has a number of very helpful articles about fix and flip financing. All of my 400 blog articles are free training lessons in commercial real estate finance. If you want to become a more successful broker, be sure to subscribe to my free blog.

Football Joke

"The reason women don't play football is because eleven of them would never wear the same outfit in public." - Phyllis Diller

Only Blackburne & Sons Can Do This:

Blackburne & Sons has some truly unique and super cool programs:

1. We'll give you a bridge loan on your commercial property for only one point! There is no prepayment penalty.
   
   
2. We allow sellers to carry back a second mortgage behind our first mortgage.
   
   
3. We will actually lend up to a 75% loan-to-value ratio. Banks claim they will lend up to 75% LTV, but in real life they will only go 68% LTV.
   
   
4. We offer private money (loosey-goosey underwriting) commercial loans with 30-year payments and a 15-year term. Our competitors offer 2- to 3-year bridge loans. We offer 15-year permanent loans with no prepayment penalty. Never again will you have a balloon payment come due during a recession.
   
   
5. We have a terrific apartment permanent program that can compete with agency loans.
   
   
6. We buy commercial first mortgages (usually at a discount).
   
   
7. Instead of discounting your wonderful commercial first mortgage, consider pledging it as collateral for a smaller loan. This is called a hypothecation. We make loans secured by mortgage notes owned by the borrower.

Uber Joke

"A man in London just took Uber's one-billionth ride, and to celebrate, Uber gave him a year's worth of free rides. The man says he's excited to spend the entire year drunk." -- Jimmy Fallon

Free Copy of the Blackburne List

The Blackburne List is a list of over 2,500 commercial lenders located nationwide. We just spent almost $30,000 and three months updating this list.

The Blackburne List is available for purchase for just $79.95. Is money tight? You can also buy one of our three Regional Lists (750+ lenders) for just $39.95. But why spend money at all?

We will trade you one of our three Regional Lists for the contact information of just one banker making commercial real estate loans. If you refer us three bankers, you will own the list for all three regions. Together you will own the entire Blackburne List.

There is another way that you can access The Blackburne List. Our newest portal, CommercialMortgage.com, is an online way to search the entire Blackburne List for the 30 lenders most suitable to make your loan. Use of CommercialMortgage.com is also 100% free!

Bad Dog, Bad Doooo... Ahhh, Give Daddy a Kiss

Sausages Joke

Patient: "Doctor, my wife thinks I'm crazy because I like sausages."

Psychiatrist: "Nonsense! I like sausages too."

Patient: "Good, you should come and see my collection. I've got hundreds of them."

Sweet Apartment Program for "A" Deals

Blackburne & Sons has an incredible apartment loan program for "A" quality deals. The rate is adjusted according to the desirability of the property and the area, but it starts at 3.87% and 1 point for a fixed rate, 30-year fully-amortized loan. For more details, please call Tom Blackburne at (574) 210-6686.

iPhone Joke

"A tech blogger in California used a weather balloon to drop an iPhone from the edge of space, at 100,000 feet in the air, to see what would happen - and still, somehow, the phone landed in the guy’s toilet." -- Jimmy Fallon

Do You Need a Commercial Loan Right Now?

If you need a non-prime, subprime, or slightly-flawed commercial loan, simply complete this super-easy mini-app to Blackburne & Sons.

If you need a bank-quality commercial mortgage loan right now from a life company, commercial bank, or conduit, you should enter your deal into C-Loans.com.

If you still can't find a commercial lender using C-Loans, then try CommercialMortgage.com.

Please keep in mind that the 3,159 commercial lenders on CommercialMortgage.com are different than the 750 commercial lenders on C-Loans.

Fishing Joke

I went fishing this morning. After a short time I ran out of worms. Then I saw a cottonmouth with a frog in his mouth. Frogs are good bass bait. Knowing the snake couldn't bite me with the frog in his mouth, I grabbed him right behind the head, took the frog, and put it in my bait bucket.

Now the dilemma was how to release the snake without getting bit. So I grabbed my bottle of Jack Daniels and poured a little whiskey in its mouth. His eyes rolled back, he went limp. I released him into the lake without incident and carried on fishing using the frog. A little later, I felt a nudge on my foot. There was that same snake, with two frogs in his mouth. Life is good in the South.

One-Point Commercial Bridge Loans

Suppose you have listed a commercial property for sale, and the seller is getting antsy. You can often hold him off long enough to find a buyer by getting him a bridge loan. Blackburne & Sons offers a six-month bridge loan for just one point and no prepayment penalty. Please click here to submit a commercial bridge loan mini-app or call me, Tom Blackburne, at (574) 210-6686.

I Never Had Relations With That Female

Oldie But Still Funny

"Every day, we get another revelation about Clinton from WikiLeaks. Anymore, and we’re going to need WikiDepends." -- Stephen Colbert

Two Ways To Earn Referral Fees For Commercial Loans - We Once Paid $21,250.

This one is an absolute no-brainer. You simply put a link to C-Loans.com on your real estate website. We once paid a $21,250 referral fee to a guy who was asleep when the lead came in! Here are the details.

You can also referral commercial loans by hand. Here is our referral fee program.

Video - Hilarious Job Interview

This was very clever, and the acting was great.

On a Personal Note

For about half of my life, I have lived in Indiana.  Over the years, I have grown somewhat used to the cold, snowy winters.  I still cannot tell you whether I prefer Indiana snowfall over northern California rain, but I do know making a snowman, throwing snowballs, and a white Christmas are things I always look forward to year after year.  That being said, here in Indianapolis it is currently 53 degrees in late November.  Bright and sunny, with no snowfall to be found.  We've experienced one of the hottest Novembers in recent history.  I do not know if this is a result of rapid global warming or simply a cyclical heat front, but I fear I may not get my white Christmas this year.  Please send me more deals so that I will be blissfully distracted from this unusual weather!

Don't Forget About C-Loans.com

We have a whole new crop of hungry commercial lenders on C-Loans, so if you have a commercial loan you're trying to place, it takes just four minutes to submit your deal to 750 commercial lenders. And remember, C-Loans.com is free!

Final Funny

Some neighbors of ours had a terrible disagreement over a patio they wanted for their backyard. The wife had rather grand ideas, while the husband wanted costs kept to a minimum. The wife won out, and the construction bill climbed higher and higher.

I dropped by one day, when the patio was near completion, and was surprised to find the husband smiling from ear to ear as the workmen smoothed over the surface. I remarked how nice it was to see a grin replace the frown he had been wearing lately. "You see where they're smoothing that cement?" he replied. "I just threw my wife's credit cards in there."

Contact Information

4811 Chippendale Drive, Suite 101, Sacramento, CA 95841 Telephone: (574) 210-6686 * Fax: (916) 338-2328
Real Estate Broker -- California Bureau of Real Estate -- License Number 829677