You are receiving this letter because you either wrote to us or you are a commercial real estate broker client of either Blackburne & Sons or C-Loans, Inc. Today we'll explain why cap rates on commercial properties are headed even lower. We also have lots of cute, clean jokes, funny pics, and a surprising video for you.

Joke Du Jour

As chaplain in a university residence hall, I am supposed to uphold all of the school rules, which include a ban on pets. That changed when a kitten adopted me. The freshmen in my dorm kept my secret. They covered for me by calling my kitten "the Book," since I had so many in my room. One morning I was leaving the dorm with the kitten in a carrier. A student stopped me and asked, "Where are you taking the Book?" I explained that I was taking the kitten to the vet. "She's getting neutered today," I told him. "Hmmm," the student responded, "no sequels."

Behind By 2, Final Seconds Ticking Down, 3...2...1

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Is your client's commercial property partially-vacant? Do you need a lender who will allow the seller to carry back a second mortgage? Does your client have a balloon payment coming due on his commercial property? Has your bank offered him a discounted pay-off? Does your borrower have less-than-stellar credit? Is your client's company losing money? Need a non-recourse commercial loan? We make slightly scratched-and-dented commercial loans.

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Blackburne & Sons is looking for commercial real estate loans that are not quite clean enough for a bank. Please click here to submit a private money commercial loan or call me, Tom Blackburne, at (574) 210-6686.

Senior Breakfast Joke

We went to breakfast at a restaurant where the "seniors' special" was two eggs, bacon, hash browns and toast for $1.99. "Sounds good," my wife said. "But I don't want the eggs." "Then I'll have to charge you two dollars and forty-nine cents because you're ordering a la carte," the waitress warned her. "You mean I'd have to pay for not taking the eggs?" My wife asked incredulously. "I'll take the special." "How do you want your eggs?" "Raw and in the shell," my wife replied. She took the two eggs home.

Why Commercial Cap Rates Will Fall Even Further

Something extraordinary happened this month. Interest rates turned negative in Germany, Switzerland, and Japan. In fact, the headline of a recent article in The Telegraph, a British newspaper, read, “Europe's Bond Yields Fall to Their Lowest Level Since the Black Death."

Italian, Spanish and Portuguese yields have also seen spectacular drops over the past several weeks. The French state can borrow for five years at an annual rate of 0.13% (much less than 1%), and Ireland can do so at 0.32%.

Why have government bond rates fallen so low in Europe? Nervous and unhealthy European banks still aren't lending very much. Instead of making new loans, they are raking in loan payments and not re-lending the money. This is causing deflation. The European Central Bank has also embarked on another huge campaign of Quantitative Easing to try to offset this deflation.

Bottom line: European and Japanese investors are starved for yield, and the current cap rates on U.S. commercial real estate look very, very attractive to them. Look for competition from European investment funds to drive down commercial cap rates and mortgage interest rates even further.

Need a commercial loan? Simply complete this super-easy mini-app.

Business School Joke

I'd been working on my business degree for about a year when I finally got to take a popular finance course. I went to the bookstore to buy the text and was shocked to find out that it would cost me $96. I asked how much it was worth if I sold it back at the end of the semester. "You'll get $24," said the clerk. "This is insane," I protested as I wrote out the check. "I know," replied the clerk sympathetically. "I've always thought that a person who buys a book for $96 and then sells it back for $24 should fail the course."

Buying or Selling a Commercial Property? We'll Help Your Buyer With His Down Payment!

No one else in the entire country does what we do. We add our equity dollars - not debt dollars - to your buyer's down payment to create a down payment large enough to satisfy the bank.

The reason you need us is because banks are now requiring a 40% down payment on the purchase of most commercial-investment properties. To make matters worse, most banks today will not even allow the seller to carry back a second mortgage.

Does your buyer really want to put down 40% of the purchase price? Our small-balance preferred equity solves your problem. Please click here for more information about our preferred equity.

Blackburne & Sons (est. 1980) is a commercial private money lender. We will allow second mortgages behind our own first mortgages!

Please click here to apply for preferred equity or a private money commercial mortgage. You can also call me, Tom Blackburne, at (574) 210-6686.

Lemmings - The World's Cutest Looking Animals

Hoover Joke

Father Murphy was playing golf with a parishioner. On the first hole, he sliced into the rough. His opponent heard him mutter, "Hoover!" under his breath. On the second hole, the ball went straight into a water hazard. "Hoover!" again, a little louder this time. On the third hole, a miracle occurred & Fr. Murphy's drive landed on the green only six inches from the hole! "Praise be to God!" He carefully lined up the putt, but the ball curved around the hole instead of going in. "HOOVER!" By this time, his opponent couldn't withhold his curiosity any longer, and asked why the priest said "Hoover". "It's the biggest dam I know."

One-Point Commercial Bridge Loans

Suppose you have listed a commercial property for sale, and the seller is getting antsy. You can often hold him off long enough to find a buyer by getting him a bridge loan. Blackburne & Sons offers a six-month bridge loan for just one point. Please click here to submit a commercial bridge loan mini-app or call me, Tom Blackburne, at (574) 210-6686.

Senior Citizens' First Experience With New Technology Seldom Ends Well

New Apartment Program for "A" Deals

Blackburne & Sons has an incredible apartment loan program for "A" quality deals. The rate is adjusted according to the desirability of the property and the area, but it starts at 3.87% and 1 point for a 30-year fully-amortized loan. For more details, please call Tom Blackburne at (574) 210-6686.

Canvas Joke

I used to work in an art supply store. We sold artists' canvas by the yard, and you could get it in either of two widths: 36 inches or 48 inches. Customer: "Can you please cut some canvas for me?" Me: "Certainly, what width?" Customer: (confused and slightly annoyed) "Scissors?"

Too Busy to Broker Commercial Loans to Us? Why Not Just Refer Them Instead? We Make It Easy!

We once paid a $21,250 referral fee. Here is our referral fee program.

True Story From a Banker Buddy

A banker buddy of mine recently shared this true story on Facebook:

My wife needs a little cheering up, so I would like to share one of our first and funniest memories. After a few months of dating, Amy was kind enough to accompany me to one of my annual poison ivy ER visits. Yep, I needed a shot. Without hesitation, I dropped my pants AND underwear. With my naked butt in the air, I heard the nurse surprisingly say, "Sir, the needle actually goes in your arm."

The Truth About Lemming Suicides (Video)

This account will surprise you

On a Personal Note

This past weekend was my daughter's 4th birthday party. We were celebrating at the house, so I came up with a story line involving six mini games to keep the little girls entertained. The theme was Disney’s Frozen and the premise of my story was to save the captured Princess Anna from the evil Prince Hans! On their journey, they had to pin the nose on Olaf, have their faces painted, throw snowballs at a giant snow monster, go troll bowling, and use icy magic to freeze the evil Hans in order to free the princess from the dungeon.

The girls had so much fun - almost as much as I did!

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Final Funny

A man is driving along a highway and sees a rabbit jump out across the middle of the road. He swerves to avoid hitting it, but unfortunately the rabbit jumps right in front of the car. The driver, a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulls over and gets out to see what has become of the rabbit. Much to his dismay, the rabbit is dead. The driver feels so awful that he begins to cry.

A woman driving down the highway sees the man crying on the side of the road and pulls over. She steps out of the car and asks the man what's wrong. "I feel terrible," he explains, "I accidentally hit this rabbit and killed it." The blonde says, "Don't worry."

She runs to her car and pulls out a spray can. She walks over to the limp, dead rabbit, bends down, and sprays the contents onto the rabbit. The rabbit jumps up, waves its paw at the two of them and hops off down the road. Ten feet away the rabbit stops, turns around and waves again, he hops down the road another 10 feet, turns and waves, hops another ten feet, turns and waves, and repeats this again and again and again, until he hops out of sight.

The man is astonished. He runs over to the woman and demands, "What is in that can? What did you spray on that rabbit?" The woman turns the can around so that the man can read the label. It says... (Are you ready for this?) "Hair Spray: Restores life to dead hair. Adds permanent wave."

Contact Information

4811 Chippendale Drive, Suite 101, Sacramento, CA 95841 Telephone: (574) 210-6686 * Fax: (916) 338-2328
Real Estate Broker -- California Bureau of Real Estate -- License Number 829677