COMMERCIAL LENDING NEWSLETTER
You are receiving this letter because you are one of my Spartans - my top-producing brokers and investor clients - of whom I am allowed to have 300. Removal instructions are below. Today we'll talk about how you can often save your commercial loan by blanketing other property. This is a pretty important lesson. And, of course, we have lots of cute, clean jokes, some funny pics, and an amazing video for you.
Joke Du Jour
Did you hear about the Texas teacher who was helping one of her kindergarten students put on his cowboy boots? He asked for help, and she could see why. Even with her pulling and him pushing, the little boots still didn't want to go on. Finally, when the second boot was on, she had worked up a sweat. She almost cried when the little boy said, "Teacher, they're on the wrong feet." She looked down, and sure enough, they were.
It wasn't any easier pulling the boots off than it was putting them on. She managed to keep her cool as together they worked to get the boots back on, this time on the right feet. He then announced, "These aren't my boots." She bit her tongue rather than get right in his face and scream, "Why didn't you say so?" like she wanted to. And, once again she struggled to help him pull the ill-fitting boots off his little feet.
No sooner had they gotten the boots off then he said, "They're my brother's boots. My Mom made me wear 'em." Now she didn't know if she should laugh or cry; but she mustered up her last-remaining grace and courage and wrestled the boots back on his feet again.
Helping him into his coat, she asked, "Now, where are your mittens?" He said, "I stuffed 'em in the toes of my boots."
Her trial starts next month...
The World's Most Misunderstood Animal
Private Money Commercial Loans Nationwide From $100,000 to $3.5MM
Is your client's commercial property partially vacant? Do you need a lender who will allow the seller to carry back a second mortgage? Does your client have a balloon payment coming due on his commercial property? Has your bank offered him a discounted pay-off? Does your borrower have less-than-stellar credit? Is your client's company losing money? Is your borrower a foreign national? Do you need a non-recourse loan? We make slightly scratched-and-dented commercial loans.
Our hot, new product is a blanket loan against a portfolio of rental homes. Rental homes? Yup, as long as there are at least five homes or units, we consider this to be a commercial loan. We even offer a partial release clause. This loan is ideal for speculators.
And don't forget, we will quickly and happily issue you a written Loan Approval Letter - at no charge - that you can use as a fallback and to lure cheaper lenders. After all, everyone wants to lend to you if you already have a commitment. Here is our latest rate sheet.
Blackburne & Sons is looking for commercial real estate loans that are not quite clean enough for a bank. Please click here to submit a hard money commercial loan or call me, Tom Blackburne, at (574) 210-6686.
Driver's Test Joke
I had given our daughter, who was 15 at the time, a driver's manual. On the way to town one day, I was coaching her as I drove. I told her to be studying her book so as to be ready when it came time to get her driver's permit. "Oh," she said, "I already know everything in the book." "You do?" I returned. "Yep", she said, very smugly. I thought, "OK, we'll just see about that. I'll give her a hard one."
So I asked her, "How many feet does it take to stop the car if you are driving 60 miles an hour and have to slam on the brakes real hard?" "One," she replied. "What?" I asked. "One?!" She repeated her answer and then because of the confused look on my face, she added. . . "Only one, Mom. You always told me never to use my left foot on the brakes, only use my right one."
How a Broker Saved His Commercial Loan By Blanketing Other Property
This month a broker brought a borrower to Blackburne & Sons who had a $275,000 balloon payment coming due on his $350,000 strip center (78.5% LTV). To make matters worse, one of the two units in the strip center was vacant, and the borrower had spotty credit.
A first glance, this borrower was a dead man walking; but we saved the deal by also blanketing the borrower's fully-leased office building worth $450,000 that only had a $150,000 first mortgage. Blackburne & Sons ended up making a $500,000 blanket first mortgage on both buildings.
Blackburne & Sons is happy to blanket additional collateral, and in this case, the broker earned his two point fee on a much-larger $500,000 loan amount - rather than just on a $275,000 loan amount! Who here likes to earn larger commissions? Raise those hands high. :-)
Need a commercial loan? Simply complete this super-easy mini-app.
Chicken and the Road Joke (Cracks Me Up)
Q: What do you call a chicken that crosses the road twice without taking a bath? A: A dirty double crosser!
Honest, Teacher, The Dog...
Small Balance Preferred Equity ($100K to $1MM)
If an investor wants to buy a leased commercial property, banks today will seldom lend more 58% to 62% LTV. Your buyer only wants to put down 25% of the purchase price
Quick, easy preferred equity from Blackburne & Sons fills in the missing piece of the capital stack. We'll add our $150,000 in equity dollars to your client's $250,000 down payment to create a down payment large enough to satisfy the bank. Think of our preferred equity as tiny Joint Venture investments.
For more information, please call Tom Blackburne at (574) 210-6686.
Fifth Grader Joke
About 90 fifth-graders piled into the airliner I was flying, on their way home from a school trip. Once we were in the air, and the crew began serving drinks, I could hear them pleading with the children to settle down and let the other passengers get some sleep. No amount of reasoning seemed to help, until I thought of the solution that actually worked. I picked up the PA mike in the cockpit and announced, "Children, this is the Captain speaking. Don't make me stop this airplane and come back there!"
Why Hasn't This Movie Come Out? The Producer Couldn't Budget!
New Apartment Program for "A" Deals
Blackburne & Sons has a terrific new apartment loan program for "A" quality deals. These loans close in our name and are sold to an institutional investor which purchased almost $400 million in apartment loans last year.
The rate is adjusted according to the desirability of the property and the area, but it starts at 3.87% and 1 point for a 30-year fully-amortized loan. For more details, please call Tom Blackburne at (574) 210-6686.
Marriage Prank Joke
Bill had always been a prankster. As each of his friends were married, Bill made sure some type of practical joke was played upon them. Now ready to be married himself, he was dreading the payback he knew was coming.
Surprisingly, the ceremony went off without a hitch. No one stood up during the pause to offer a reason 'why this couple should not be married'. His reception wasn't disrupted by streakers or smoke-bombs, and the car the couple was to take on their honeymoon was in perfect working order. When the couple arrived at their hotel and entered the room, Bill even checked for cornflakes in the bed (a gag he had always loved). Nothing, it seemed, was amiss. Satisfied that he had come away unscathed, the couple fell into bed.
Upon waking, the two of them were ravenous, so Bill called down to room service and asked, "I'd like to order breakfast for two." At that moment, a soft voice from under the bed said, "Make that five."
Too Busy to Broker Commercial Loans to Us? Why Not Just Refer Them Instead? We Make It Easy!
We once paid a $21,250 referral fee. Here is our referral fee program.
Amazing Special Effects On the Set of Boardwalk Empire
I was completely fooled.
On a Personal Note
When my girlfriend told me she drew inspiration for our Valentine’s Day festivities from the book/movie "Gone Girl", you can imagine my surprise (and fear). She assured that she did not draw comparisons to our relationship with the unhealthy relationship portrayed in the book, I reluctantly decided to partake in her “scavenger hunt”. With clues planted throughout the house and a plethora of riddles to answer, the evening ended up being a lot of fun. And luckily for me, my girlfriend did not disappear and frame me with her murder!
Don't Forget About C-Loans.com
We have a whole new crop of hungry commercial lenders on C-Loans, so if you have a commercial loan you're trying to place, it takes just four minutes to submit your deal to 750 commercial lenders. And remember, C-Loans.com is free!
Final Funny
Back a few years ago, I went over to my neighbor's house (she had green hair), and for some reason she was mad at the world. She had locked herself in the bathroom, and she was threatening suicide. I said, "Come on, you know you don't want to do this!" She said, "I darn well do want to do this. Nobody wants me alive anyway's." For some reason, I actually believed her; so I pushed through the door and saw she had a rope tied around her ankles. I asked "Are you really trying to hang yourself?" "Yeah, so what?" "Well, usually when people hang themselves, they tie the rope around their necks" "Yeah, well," she replied, "I tried that, but then I couldn't breathe."
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Contact Information
Tom Blackburne
BRE# - 01919403
NMLS# - 1014118
BLACKBURNE & SONS REALTY CAPITAL CORPORATION
4811 Chippendale Drive, Suite 101
Sacramento, CA 95841
Phone: (574) 210-6686
Fax: (916) 338-2328
Email: tommy@blackburne.com
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