You are receiving this letter because you are a client of either Blackburne & Sons or C-Loans, Inc. Removal instructions are below. Today we're going to teach you a super-easy way to understand cap rates. And, of course, like always, we have lots of cute, clean jokes and two funny pics for you.

Joke Du Jour

I'm not the easiest guy in the world to get along with; so when our anniversary rolled around, I wanted my wife to know how much I appreciated her tolerating me for the past 20 years. I ordered flowers and told the florist to enclose a card that read, "Thanks for putting up with me so long." When my wife got the delivery, she called me at work. "Just where do you think you are going?" she asked. "What do you mean?" I asked. She read the card aloud as the florist had written it, "Thanks for putting up with me. So long."

D@mnYouAutoCorrect is the Funniest Site!

If you have never visited DamnYouAutoCorrect.com, you are missing the funniest web site on the internet. When the iPhone misunderstands or mis-corrects the words, some incredibly side-splitting text conversations have accidentally been created.

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Blackburne & Sons is looking for commercial real estate loans that are not quite clean enough for a bank. Please click here to submit a hard money commercial loan or call me, Tom Blackburne, at 574-210-6686.

Norm Peterson Funnies

Some of the best Norm Peterson quotes from "Cheers":

"What's shaking, Norm?"
"All four cheeks and a couple of chins."

"What's new, Normie?"
"Terrorists, Sam. They've taken over my stomach and they're demanding beer."

"How's it going, Mr. Peterson?"
"Poor."
"I'm sorry to hear that."
"No, I mean pour."

Understanding Cap Rates

A cap rate is simply the return on your investment if you buy a commercial property for all cash. In other words, think of a cap rate as the "interest" you would earn if you bought a commercial building for all cash.

Every commercial property is different. Some commercial buildings are so attractive and are so well-located that most investors would "lust" to own them. Other commercial properties are more bread-and-butter properties, with no distinguishing appeal. Finally, some commercial properties look terrible, are in need of repair, and are located in crumby neighborhoods. Yuck. Therefore when you go to sell commercial properties, the cap rate will be different for each one.

More. (Be sure to sign up for the old man's free training articles, right below his picture.)

Purple Joke

Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!

Too Busy to Broker Commercial Loans to Us? Why Not Just Refer Them Instead? We Make It Easy!

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On a Personal Note

Halloween is a strange holiday.  As I understand it, the day originates from a Celtic celebration of honoring the gods and to convert pagens.  The reasons for dressing up served to disguise the mortal from the actual evil spirits supposedly on the hunt for souls to take.  Conversley, the concept of Trick or Treating represents how these evil spirits would disguise themselves as humans and would visit Celtic homes in hopes of claiming new souls.  

I say this is a strange holiday because had I known as a child what I know now, perhaps I would not have participated year after year.  But that being said, to children it is not about the dressing up or the haunted houses or the jack o' lanterns; It is all about the CANDY!

So, my daughter will be dressing up as a pumpkin and will go trick or treating.  As good parents, we cannot let her eat more than a few pieces of candy ... which leaves a whole lot left for me!

Giraffes Gone Wild

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Shutdown Joke

I’m glad the government has shutdown. Think about it, for the first time in years it’s safe to talk on the phone and send emails without anybody listening in. -- Jay Leno

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